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Warmonger
Clan Blood Spirit
Star Commander
Joined: 04-Feb-2002 00:00
Posts: 84
Location: United States
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 Posted: 23-Jul-2002 22:58 Post subject: Humorous story that has nothing to do with anything |
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What can I say, I believe in truth in advertising  Anywho, this story was related to me by my roomate last semester as something that happened to some of his friends, which means this is about one step away from urban legend territory. Still funny though.
So, my roomate's friends were sharing an apartment in a fairly large complex, nothing too bad, but in the same room, next floor up, lived a couple of Jehovah's Witnesses. Every week, so early that it was still late, they came knocking by on their rounds. The friends got tired of this (duh), and they came up with a plan to stop it. Now, they were active in the SCA(Society for Creative Anachronists), so they got some of their freinds from there to help. These guys were really big, blond guys, I'm talking real Vikings here. Next morning, the Jehovah's Witnesses opened their door to see three big men in full armor, complete with horned helmets, and this is what they hear (In a really bad Nordic accent)
"Hello, we are Odin's witnesses. Have you heard of the glory of Valhalla and the Ygdrassl tree?"
They never knocked on the friends' door again.
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"A man who does not speak his own words, does not think his own thoughts." -me
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Nightmare
Lyran Alliance
Kommandant-General
Joined: 03-May-2002 00:00
Posts: 2214
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| Posted: 24-Jul-2002 06:55 Post subject: Humorous story that has nothing to do with anything |
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 Good story!
I live a bit closer to the Witnesses, though. They have a Reichshall (or whatever the translation`s supposed to be) only ~100 meters away on the same side of the street.
Every week there`s usually at least one big meeting, with cars parked all along the streets nearby. They seem to keep records of where people are receptive, it`s been a few years since they`ve knocked on my door. The last time I unleashed a musician/philosopher on them, and they had to flee before he made them doubt the word of Jehova.
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A tree fall in the forest, and no one is around, and it hits a mime. Does anyone care?
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Sir Henry
Team Bansai
Senior Tech Specialist
Joined: 04-Feb-2002 00:00
Posts: 4899
Location: United States
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| Posted: 24-Jul-2002 07:53 Post subject: Humorous story that has nothing to do with anything |
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It called a Kingdom Hall, Harware.
Warmonger, Most of My Friends are into Medieval Reinacting, Me Included. I think I know a couple of those Odin's Witnesses here....They're everywhere....
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Sir Henry
A Dragon in the disguise of a bunny, is still a Dragon.
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Black_Phoenix
Clan Nova Cat
Star Colonel
Joined: 23-Jun-2002 00:00
Posts: 382
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| Posted: 24-Jul-2002 09:12 Post subject: Humorous story that has nothing to do with anything |
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Hey, Jehovah's Witnesses are nice people.
*Pulls out a rifle.*
"You have ten seconds to run."
I have never had an encounter with them, but I have various plans of how to mess with their minds the first time they bug. 
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History is much like an endless waltz. The three beats of war, peace and revolution continue on forever.
-Gundam Wing: Endless Waltz
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Hardware
Clan Ghost Bear
Star Colonel
Joined: 04-Feb-2002 00:00
Posts: 605
Location: United States
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| Posted: 24-Jul-2002 11:39 Post subject: RE: Humorous story that has nothing to do with anything |
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I have found that two pit bulls frantically pawing at a storm door that is wiggling and bowing and threatening to pop off the little latch is a great way to dissuade Joho's from coming to your house. Or if I'm at home one of my dogs always gets in the bay window when someone approaches my house. I don't get too many solicitors.
Not that my dogs would do much besides knock you down and lick you, but they don't know that. It's about the only time I'm grateful for the bad rap the media gives my dogs.
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The more I get to know people the more I like my dog.
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Rarich
Federated Suns
Leftenant General
Joined: 05-Feb-2002 00:00
Posts: 991
Location: United States
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| Posted: 24-Jul-2002 14:38 Post subject: RE: Humorous story that has nothing to do with anything |
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A friend of mine with a house and a yard started reading NRS207.200 (Tresspass) to witnesses when they came to vist. He then sent a letter to the local kingdom hall about the continued harrassment. Eventually he marched a couple off property at gunpoint (you can get away with that here if you have tresspassed or 86'd them and remain legal)according to the range protection laws still on the books. They finally stopped coming.
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Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side & a dark side, and strings also lie under it all.
Life is a sexually transmitted terminal disease.
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Sarkkahn
Draconis Combine
Tai-i
Joined: 12-Jul-2002 00:00
Posts: 394
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| Posted: 24-Jul-2002 14:44 Post subject: RE: Humorous story that has nothing to do with anything |
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Sounds like a plan to me
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You want some? Come and get it
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Sir Henry
Team Bansai
Senior Tech Specialist
Joined: 04-Feb-2002 00:00
Posts: 4899
Location: United States
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| Posted: 24-Jul-2002 18:17 Post subject: RE: Humorous story that has nothing to do with anything |
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Answering the door naked works. Twice.
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Sir Henry
A Dragon in the disguise of a bunny, is still a Dragon.
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Alexander
Heavy Horse Merc Brigade
Commanding Officer
Joined: 04-Feb-2002 00:00
Posts: 828
Location: Canada
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| Posted: 24-Jul-2002 19:18 Post subject: RE: Humorous story that has nothing to do with anything |
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So, I take it they either didn't notice the first time, or didn't really care? 
Alexander
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War is God's way of teaching geography.
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Commanding Officer, North West Armoured Cavalry
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Sir Henry
Team Bansai
Senior Tech Specialist
Joined: 04-Feb-2002 00:00
Posts: 4899
Location: United States
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| Posted: 24-Jul-2002 19:31 Post subject: RE: Humorous story that has nothing to do with anything |
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Two different houses, havn't seen theme since...
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Sir Henry
A Dragon in the disguise of a bunny, is still a Dragon.
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Mechlord3130
Clan Nova Cat
Point Commander
Joined: 24-Jul-2002 00:00
Posts: 17
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| Posted: 25-Jul-2002 10:45 Post subject: RE: Humorous story that has nothing to do with anything |
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Ok, that was funny. I about fell out of my chair
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"That which does not kill me, makes me stronger...."
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Mechlord
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That which does not kill me will probably taste great well done, with a side of sharp chedder, and a fine red wine
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Jade_Dragon
8th Sword of Light
Sho-sho
Joined: 05-Feb-2002 00:00
Posts: 1326
Location: United States
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| Posted: 25-Jul-2002 11:47 Post subject: RE: Humorous story that has nothing to do with anything |
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The mere thoughty has caused em to close my eyes making this reply typo proone,
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The JadeDragon
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Sarkkahn
Draconis Combine
Tai-i
Joined: 12-Jul-2002 00:00
Posts: 394
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| Posted: 25-Jul-2002 14:04 Post subject: RE: Humorous story that has nothing to do with anything |
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Answering the door naked sounds like a bad Idea, I mean what if there not who you think they are and their your neighbors wanting to borrow a cup of sugar?
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You want some? Come and get it
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Alexander
Heavy Horse Merc Brigade
Commanding Officer
Joined: 04-Feb-2002 00:00
Posts: 828
Location: Canada
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| Posted: 25-Jul-2002 19:16 Post subject: RE: Humorous story that has nothing to do with anything |
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That's what the spyglass in the door is for... besides, either way, you'll get bothered a lot less!
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War is God's way of teaching geography.
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Commanding Officer, North West Armoured Cavalry
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Sarkkahn
Draconis Combine
Tai-i
Joined: 12-Jul-2002 00:00
Posts: 394
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| Posted: 25-Jul-2002 23:12 Post subject: RE: Humorous story that has nothing to do with anything |
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oh ok how bout this, what if its your girl friends parents coming over to meet you and they just came back from church carrying a bible, guess what is going to happen when you answer the door naked
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